When mentoring our pre-service and in-service teachers we need to describe and model both research-based and clinically tested best practices. Accordingly, our mentees should know how to teach students to replace the anti-social skills they have mastered with productive, and effective pro-social skills such as the ability to respectfully listen to others.
This is the second part of a two-part lesson on teaching students to listen respectfully to each other. To read the first part of this lesson click on to this url: http://richarddsolomonsblog.blogspot.com/2010/02/teacher-interventions-when-disruptive_11.html
Teach Students to Respectfully Listen to Each Other (*Solomon & Solomon, 1987)
Enduring Jewish Knowledge: These middot: Derech Eretz-showing civility and respect for others, and Tzelem Elohim-all people are created in HaShem’s image.
Materials Needed: Demonstration of Disrespectful Listening Recording Form (displayed at the top of this post), a writing implement, a person is needed to demonstrate respectful and disrespectful listening with you. This person can be a madrich, teaching assistant, or another teacher.
Note: Respectful Listening involves two skills, paraphrasing and probing. The listener must paraphrase the speaker, and then ask probing, non-judgmental questions (see the dialogue below).
1. The teacher engages in a conversation with another person, (called the speaker), in which the teacher demonstrates disrespectful listening to the class, while the students record what they see and hear the teacher doing during the conversation. A sample conversation demonstrating disrespectful listening between a teacher and the speaker appears next. It is followed by the disrespectful listening recording form.
Teacher: What is your opinion about someone choosing to make aliyah?
Speaker: That’s stupid! Why would anyone want to do that? It’s a dangerous country; it has a different language; friends and family are here; why would anyone want to move away from the United States?
Teacher: You’re the one who’s stupid. You’re too simple minded to understand that people move to Israel because they have a great love for the land. (As the teacher is saying this, he raises his voice, moves closer to the other person, and points his finger at her.)
Speaker: I’m not stupid; you’re stupid because if someone disagrees with you, you call him stupid. Now you know what I call that, really STUPID!
2. The teacher facilitates a classroom discussion on the differences (visual and auditory) between respectful and disrespectful listening.
3. The teacher places students in dyads, and invites them to role-play or practice respectful listening on a topic that they choose or one the teacher chooses. If desirable, the class can brainstorm topics for the demonstration. Note that students do not practice disrespectful listening.
4. The teacher monitors the dyads practicing respectful listening, and gives them feedback on their role-playing. Dyads who have mastered this social skill can demonstrate respectful listening to the entire class.
5. The teacher explains that respectful listening is a Jewish middah, or virtue; we are expected to show respect for our classmates, and others.
*Solomon, R. & Solomon, E. (1987). The Handbook for the Fourth R: Relationship Skills. Columbia, MD. National Institute for Relationship Training, Inc .
On the next post we will describe four basic conversational pro-social skills students in a Judaic classroom need to master in order to get along with others.